Our First Appliance Purchase

Our fridge went tits up on us. Well, half of it did. It was free though so it was no particular loss to us it just sucks needing to shell out $1,000 on demand.

The house did not have a fridge when we moved in. I can see that as being a hindrance to a potential buyer. A fridge is not cheap, they are also not easy to just move in. Lucky for us, when we rented in Lynnwood the landlord told us the fridge in the garage was left by the previous renter. He made it quite clear it was not his responsibility and he didn't care what we did with it. Well we used that sucker a lot and when we bought our house that needed a fridge we took it with us. We got 3 years and 2 months worth of fridge for free. It would have been rocking cool if it lasted a lot longer at the new place but, still. I should not complain. We learned the fridge was made in 1997. 

One day here on the island we had the power go on and off several times over the course of an hour. The next day I noticed the frozen blueberries in the freezer were no longer frozen. The day after that I realized my frozen chicken was very cold but not frozen. The day after that I realized the fridge was not cold and I went crazy. I put everything I could fit in a cooler and cleaned the fridge thinking that would help. Nope. James and I discussed how much we could afford. He guessed $500. Wah. Wah. It was very stressful. He didn't want to buy a new fridge, he didn't want to haul one in and another one out. He also didn't want to do all that hauling and have our cheap one expire in the next few years only to do it all again. Meanwhile I have hungry people to feed and am afraid to give them things from the fridge. 

Luckily he found one in Tacoma at the Sears outlet store. It had a dented handle and scratches down the sides. $1700 originally down to $923. Cha-Ching. It's a beauty. He and Will drive down to pick it up and after convincing our bank it wasn't a fraudulent purchase all while Will was freaking out in the store the fridge was ours. 

Once home though things really fell apart. My mother in law came over to watch the kids while James and I hauled this beast up two flights of stairs in the rain, in the cold and of course, in the dark. Kiki of course lost it. She panics when separated from me. Will wants to help and watch. We got the fridge up our deck stairs and I didn't die though I could have had the dolly slipped once. James and Diana were quite stressed. Then the fridge wouldn't fit through our front door so it had to be taken off. Then it wouldn't fit up our staircase so the handles of the fridge had to be removed. This business of removing seriously took half an hour and we ruined a screen and also have a few new scratches on our walls. Our house was cold as were the occupants. The fridge was wet and we tried two different ways of getting it up our stairs. Finally we just leaned it on its side and pushed it up the stairs. A good 45 minutes to haul something 30 feet. I know what your thinking. It did fit. Perfectly. No problems there. James and I dollied the old one down the stairs no prob. We pushed it onto the truck and nearly took out our stair railing. James also fell out of the truck and I grabbed him by his pant legs. He recovered but he was clearly over this fridge episode.

So there you have it. Being a homeowner is a never ending job.

Welcome To Our Home, Please Kill The Hobo Spiders

Holy Spider Central. I have now lost count of how many spiders we have killed.  Take note I said Kill. We have stopped rescuing them.  We kill on the spot now. We kill so many our son says he now kills things.
Yes I am bothered. No, I don't like it.  These spiders are HUGE.  They can hurt you. Most importantly though, they can hurt my children and therefore they must die.  Its a good freaking thing they are so big they are impossible to miss.  It sucks when you do kill one because they crunch.
We find them mostly downstairs.  I did find one upstairs, in my kitchen, dead. I was greatly offended.  My kitchen isn't the cleanest place but come on.  He was in the middle of my floor, dead.  I found one on my ceiling, my raised ceiling.  I was so pumped. I woke up before the kids. I was going to have coffee and look at the beautiful day and have nice quiet peace. Nope. Walked into my living room and bam, huge ass spider crawling along the ceiling.  Kissed my sweet morning and sleeping kids goodbye.  I got my broom out and actually broke it hitting the spider so hard with it.  Spider died and the kids did sleep, WIN! Tonight, James killed one when it crawled out from under the stove and booked it to our sweet boy who was playing with a box of goodies from grandma. It took James quite awhile to calm down from the horrible "what if" thoughts.
We find them all the time in the garage and the downstairs bathroom.  We are quite perplexed by how they are getting in. Ws it just a huge spider orgy in here while the place was vacant? Are they breeding in the trees and coming in? I tried looking up on Pinterest what they hate.  Lavender and peppermint was what I was told. Nope, fat lies. I have three fat spiders living IN my lavender bush.  Those ones are not hobo spiders so they get to live outside.  We bought a playhouse on CL that unfortunately was housing big spiders.  I doused it in peppermint oil and still find spiders in it. I just keep killing them.

Sewage Anyone?

Moving in to this house has been a battering of projects. They are not "oh, we will do this eventually" projects. They are "we have to do this NOW" projects.

We are trying to finish up the laundry room project so we can have hot and clean water. Also, so we can do our laundry. You can't wash your hands here, you can't get water from the sink to cook with, you can't do dishes and we can't do laundry. No baths for my filthy kids. No shower for James to take before going to work. We are camping.

Our friend James tiled our floor for us. He wasn't supposed to do it by himself but that's what wound up happening. My James was busy packing and unpacking. Word to the wise, moving with a 7 month old is gonna s l o w you down. James did a great job tiling, it looks real nice. Now my James has to get it sealed, grouted, water heater installed, and install the washer and dryer.

Okay, so what about the other projects? Well, a few posts ago I told you I spotted mold on the ceiling of the garage. Yeah. It's gotten worse. James made a rule that no one uses that bathroom. Well, someone, I won't name names, broke his rule. So instead of pulling out the trees growing into our foundation, instead of fixing our stairs, instead of creating a deer proof fence, instead of anything else, we must now open a can of worms and fix it. A nasty, potentially barfy, can of worms. Oh. Joy. Just in time for summer!

Goodnight Raccoons

The other day our dog Allie took of chasing two gigantic raccoons. We called her off of them immediately because we saw them before she did and so we knew what she was up to.

I noticed our neighbors had a heavy duty, sorta intense garbage system. It looked like it would repel bears but I knew it was to keep the coons away.

Our friends were over last night helping us settle in for our first official night of residing in our new home. I was telling them that I hoped to not hear any weird noises in the night. I must have set the stage for a unique night with that remark.

As James and the kids settled in for the night and everyone drifted off to sleep I started hearing noises. Crashing noises. Not loud and sorta subtle. I thought it was deer eating my plants but I knew all the plants were safe. I couldn't sleep because I could hear something. James finally heard it too and decided something was on the deck. For now our beds are in the living room. We are waiting for the bedrooms to be painted and carpeted. So we peaked out the blinds but saw nothing. I didn't think coons ate plants so I drifted off to sleep.

I was awoken later by James. He was by the door to the deck shining a light out on the deck. I asked what was going on. He told me that he was awoken by a coon scratching at the door trying to get in. WTF. These assholes climbed our stairs, climbed up the railings and entered the deck domain. Its not an inviting deck for critters. Theres no staircase to it. you gotta want to get up there. The door on the deck into the house happens to have bad scratch marks on it from what I thought was a cat. Maybe a dog. Perhaps a coon. It's on the inside too, but only the stain is worn down. No scratches.

So here's James, half naked, flashlight in one hand, plunger in the other, door open, kids sleeping, middle of the night, trying to scare off some coons that have no fear. He's trying so hard to be quiet and get them off our deck. He shuts the door dragging with him a box, takes a step and lands on a squeaky rubber chicken. Luckily, no one stirs.

In the morning I see the box. It's been torn open and ransacked for birdseed. Dammit. How do people have bird feeders? The only things that get my seed are fat squirrels and now fat coons. I got on Pinterest and found out what coons hate. As soon as I can get to Costco I am buying cinnamon, black pepper and Epsom salt. It's on coons, it's on.

Goodbye House

I am going to miss this house. Sometimes I see Will in parts of the house and I think I could burst into tears.

We became a family under this roof. Both kids were brought home to this house. Will learned how to be a boy here. So many, many memories are about to be taken away.

As I pack the house I simply can't imagine anyone else living here before or after us. I walk through the rooms and I wonder what great experiences were held here. I wonder if other kids will live here. I really wonder if anyone will have it as good here as we did.

It's kinda sad leaving the house your boy grew up in. The only house your daughter has ever known. The living room they play in everyday. The room your boy slept in on his own. The window that watched so many things come and go. The yard you played and gardened in so many times. The kitchen your boy demolished. The bathtub you bathed your children in. It's so sad to see it go.

Our neighbors are even sad to see us go. I hoped it wouldn't be so hard. Keely will never remember this place and Will in time may forget. He came into his own here. So many fun, awesome and joyous times were held here. I feel like I am leaving a part of my soul here. A huge chapter is closing. I am getting older. I am excited about our new place. Really, I am. It's going to be such fun. This place though will always be so special to me and I thank it so much for being so good to us.

Where Is Frank?

I knew yesterday I would have to get to the house early. I did not realize I would have to go tearing out of here like a mad woman.

I was awake and laying with the kids. Will woke up wondering where his daddy was. I told him he was working and he cried for a minute. He then told me to get up, put my boobies away (I am nursing Keely), put my eyes in (my contact lenses) and brush my teeth. With that said I was up and at em. I got a call from James but he hung up. Next thing I knew I had a voicemail from a number I didn't know. I listened. It was Frank from Home Depot saying he would be catching a ferry and get to us between 9 and 11. I called back immediately. You see we went with the Oak Harbor Home Depot specifically because they were not going to charge us for them taking the ferry. Here they are now taking the ferry! He assured me there would be no charge to us. The island guy was too busy to do it so he got the job. He said he would be on the 8:30 ferry. That's when panic really set in. It was 7:15. I had to leave in 45 minutes. I told Will we needed to bust a move to meet Frank at the new house. He told me he loved Frank.

The kids needed diaper changes, dressing, breakfast, Allie needed food, a potty, I needed to get dressed, pack the car still and have coffee. My mom was going to ride with us and she was still in Ballard. 45 minutes was not going to be enough. I flew through everything. No coffee. Allie didn't eat but she peed. Will ate breakfast in the car and I managed to pack a few things in a cooler. My mom said she would catch a later ferry.

We made the ferry. We got to the house with Frank. We were greeted by two small yapping dogs in our driveway. They belong to the 5 pack beer guy. They remained on our property for a good portion of the day. I took Frank in and showed him where to measure. I asked him if he thought it was the carpet that stunk. He had this funny look on his face that he was clearly uncomfortable. He told me I needed to paint the floorboards with something called Kilz. He said it would lock out the odor and other animals wouldn't pick up the scent. That's kinda where he really got me. Allie won't pee in a house but other animals we may own might AND people who visit may have an animal that will. Done. Decided.

Frank was telling me about his buddies truck that had been stolen. He was going to finish up here and go get the truck. Quite unprofessional but if that Kilz stuff works great. We wanted to know how much it would be for Home Depot to rip and remove the carpet but we had to change our tune. Frank said they wouldn't put that stuff on for you. They would rip out the old, put in the new and the funk would always be there. Well, for that cost I am making sure that funk is gone. My mom ripped out the carpet in all three rooms. That stuff is so heavy. It was so gross. I rolled the carpet and saw it was stained with orange/brown circles everywhere. It was so filthy. We were thinking we would just carpet clean the place. Then we decided to just buck up and re carpet. Wow. Yes. That carpet needed to go ASAP. After Frank left to go rescue his buddies truck Will must have asked me 100 times where Frank was.

Mom Of The Year

The honor does not go to me though I did try to take it. It goes to my mom. She removed the correctly guessed bat. She nearly barfed.

We took all the food out of the kitchen. I told her she could take the kids for a car ride but she had me take them. I tried to offer her anything she might need. I told her there was a pile of boxes in the corner, pointed out the paper towels and the disinfectant wipes. She insisted she was fine. So, the kids and I headed out for paint. Specifically, Kilz paint, we are dealing with the wrath of animal odor in this place.

10 minutes into driving I get a call from my mom. I am a little worried she is calling for back up or calling to ask where something is. I answer and she tells me the deed is done. She said she put a box under the light fixture and it plopped right in. She said the smell was horrific and she thinks it could be why the house smelled in the first place. I asked where it currently was and she informed me it was on the deck. I also asked if she took a picture for our viewers. She told me I could do that when I got home. A few minutes later my phone buzzed and it was a picture of the bat with flies around it. A stylist couldn't have done a better job. That picture can't help giving the willy's.

Easter Funday

Today was Easter. I made tons of eggs for Will that had jelly beans, peeps and animal crackers. Him discovering them and getting into it was one of the best parts of today. The worst parts of today were: no masks for the dirty project, finding mold growing on the garage ceiling, very sad mail, a deck that slants, possibly finding a dead bat in the light fixture of the stove and soaking wet shoes.

My shoes were soaked for the majority of the day due to morning dew. Quite uncomfortable. I tried drying them in the sun at the house but it wasn't quite strong enough and I kept needing to put my shoes on. I tried drying them in my mother in laws dryer but her dryer just kept rejecting them. I put them back in the sun and just stayed barefoot for a few hours. It finally worked.

We woke up this morning and went and got coffee from a very pregnant bitter barista. We went to the house and did our Easter egg hunt with Will. So sweet. So cute. That boy loves jelly beans. Not so much a peep fan and likes his animal crackers but would rather have a jelly bean. James went on to scraping and I watched the kidlets. After a while we convened in the garage. We are giving away these 6ftX10ft fence pieces that came with the house. We are looking around and then I spot it. Mold. Something is wet up there. James thinks its the master toilet. We aren't allowed to use it until its fixed. Joy. I have a husband in over his head with this laundry room re model, he starts school on Tuesday, he commutes by ferry now and we have to wait for him to find time to fix a lord knows what.

We decide to leave and go have lunch and nap time. Even though I have had 2 coffees, I am beat. It's amazing how much stress can exhaust you. For funsies we check out our mailbox. Wow. Nasty. Barely hanging on. Needs replacing stat. There is though tons of mail. We pull it out and drive to Bobs. I look through the mail. There's a letter in there, open, from someone that obviously cared very much about the previous tenants. It expresses great concerns about their whereabouts and their wellness. It's ends with a strong desire for them to call. The other mail is stuff for the beneficiaries of the male homeowner. A couple pieces for a son, whom James of course knows, and possibly something about being laid off. By looking at postmark dates we can gather the house has been empty since at least January of 2012. Long Time. So sad.

After getting to Bobs very tired and slightly emotionally drained we hang out in the sun with Toby and Catie. Then James takes Will to nap and I take Kiki to nap. Kiki isn't sleeping. I get a text that Will pooped and isn't sleeping. We get up and go play some more in the sun. Will spends hours running around butt naked in his grandparents yard and house. He is simply sublime. We are all greatly entertained. Toby and Cate made everyone Easter dinner which we had at 3. So fun. Then we all piled into cars to be to a hardware store before 5. We had 20 minutes to get there. We made it, James got his tool and back to the new house we went.

Toby and Cate took a tour and left soon after. Bob sat in the chair he brought and James got back to work. I took the kids upstairs and had my most happiest moment ever. Before I had my moment though I went downstairs only to discover that James' new tool was creating a dust storm and neither Bob nor James was wearing a mask. I made James stop and asked if he had a mask. No, he didn't. I gave him a shirt of mine to wrap around his face and gave Bob Wills triple 7 shirt. Whatta pair. Back upstairs I made Will a bottle of apple juice. I put Kiki in her toy and we all sat on the deck. It was sunny and warm. Kiki was happy. Will say in my lap and let me just love on him. Eventually he turned around to face me. He rested his sweet head on my chest and let me just hold him and love him. Pure Bliss. Nothing is better than loving your children. Nothing. Kiki squealed with delight and I held Will in my arms. In the sun. On the deck we owned. The deck that we noticed isn't level, but that we owned.

We returned inside when Kiki lost it and needed to eat. She let us know she was done eating when she went to tackle Will. After playing a minute I got down to cleaning. I need to clean the hardwood floor and am at a standstill as to how to do it. So instead I cleaned the stove. I put Will up on the counter and we explored the stove. After wiping down the stove top we turned on the stove light and looked at it. There was something very large sitting on the light cover. It looked like a bat. I called up James. He messed with it for a minute, tacked another project to his list and told me to keep the light off so we don't cook it.

James was able to finish the first part of his laundry room project. We finalized a carpet choice. We really like the tile we chose. We tried to catch the ferry back to Lynnwood but it was 2 hours long. We went back to Bobs. Kiki screamed the whole way. Thank goodness tomorrow is Monday and James goes to work. We shouldn't have any more house problems until Tuesday when I come back to have the house measured for carpet.

The Most Popular House On The Block

Day two and this place is a mess. Poop on the floor, dead wasps, a leak, a nasty, nasty hot water heater, stinging nettles, no chairs, and a laundry room that has rot in it.

I am exhausted. It's exhausting taking care of two kids when you have no where to put them. We started the day fine. James made breakfast, we hung out with Bobs caretaker Bonnie and then hit the road. I took James to the house then took the kids to an Easter egg hunt. We were supposed to meet friends but that didn't really work out. We got there just in time for the hunt. Will got 4 eggs and decided to ride the toy plane. It was fine by me. My instinct was to have him keep looking but there were SO many kids and I had to remember the point of going. That point was to have fun. So will had a great time playing. I surprised myself by how much I let him do on his own. I had Keely in the front pack so I was severely limited in what I could do with him. I watched a ton of kids fall and a ton of kids get run into. It was a battleground. Thankfully Will never hit or got hurt by anyone. We got to check out the fire truck, we got to sit in it and we got a cool hat. He was all set for nap time. We went to Bobs and fell asleep.

Once we got up we gathered some stuff, got Bob and headed to the house. Things were moving along. James had the laundry room pretty much pulled apart. He introduced me to our neighbor (Aaron) with the awesome play set. Our new neighbor said it was cool if Will wanted to play on it. WIN!! Also met his pregnant wife Rachel. I met another neighbor (George?) who was mowing our lawn. George apparently gets a little confused. His son owns the property next to us. He thought Aaron was my husband.

Once inside I put a naked Keely on the blanket while I made James and Bob some sammies. Keely was starting to lose it by the time I delivered the sammies and it turns out she shit the blanket hard core. Her legs and feet were covered in poop. There was poop chunks everywhere. I actually ripped open the wipe pack because I couldn't get them out fast enough. All the while so pissed at myself for letting this happen again. I cleaned her up, cleaned me up, cleaned the blanket up and then found two huge turds under the blanket.

I take the kids onto the deck and feed Keely while Will plays with chalk at my feet. Things are good. When Keely is done I stick her in a toy, bring her on the deck and Will and I garden. I knock the old wasp nest off the roof. It hits the ground and all I see are bees. I let out a good Oh Shit and slam the windows shut. I go get Keely and realize there's no bees. I go look, they are all dead except for one living bee. I sweep everything off the deck. Next thing I tackle is the potted plants. I realize the best thing to do is throw them off the deck. I take the dirt out and Will and I toss it over. He loses Dino in the process but is surprisingly cool about it. Now Keely is tired and Bob has taken my one chair on the deck. I go downstairs and take over his wheelchair. Kiki falls asleep quickly.

About this time the neighborhood slowly converges on our house. Our friends Gunner and Ahna have come to say hi and help. Ahnas mom comes over too. People aren't exactly quiet, but it's not terribly loud. Personally, if it was me and I saw a mom in a wheelchair holding a sleeping baby I may have bailed. Kiki managed to get a decent sleep and all the cooing over her was no problem after all.

While I had her asleep James and Gunner were investigating the hot water heater. Turns out that thing was NASTY. They pulled up some plug thingy and it had lots of white growth on it. It looked like chunks of laundry soap. James was over it. This quick project turned into finding rot on the floor, needing a $1000 water heater and several tools and phone calls to finish the first part of the project. He went outside to hack the multitude of stinging nettles we have. While doing that Steve and Mimi come by. They are the parents of the girls we met the previous night. Well, James tells them our problem and what do you know, Steve is a plumber. He can get us a new water heater for $250. We found out he likes Crown Royal. I had given Kiki to Ahna and went outside to meet these two wonderful people. After a few minutes Kiki started to cry and I went in. Turns out there was water all over the floor. It had been covered by the huge cooler Gunner brought over. This massive leak was actually the result of water dripping out of a pipe that was connected to the water heater. Major disaster slightly averted.

Holy Jeez. Buying a house is whack. The problems, oh the problems!

The First Day

Our house is now legally ours! YES!! We actually own a whole home. It's freaking ours. When we are done with it we have to actually SELL it. No telling a landlord we are vacating next month. No, no, no. $10,000 dollars and a buyer are all we need.

After a little wait we got on our ferry. It was a gorgeous day. The kids were content. There was peace in our world. We stopped off at the Red Apple, piled into one car and drove to Shellie's property. Wow. She's got a nice place. They had a bonfire going, James talked to her husband for forever and a day. Shellie showed us a tree frog she caught. Will and I wandered around and took pictures. Finally James was done talking and Shellie handed us two plants and a bag full of goodies with our key attached to the bag. She put it on a Whidbey Island key chain. She is the best!! We took off for the Red Apple and got our other car. Then we took off for the new home!

When we got there the place was open. The lock was gone so we just turned the knob and let ourselves in. Will rode his trike around the bare floors and had a great time. We opened every window because there is a funky smell. We think its the carpeted stairs. I put the plants Shellie gave us (mints) in the sunny window to combat the stink. We unpacked our cleaning supplies. I swept up all the dead flys and moths. We put a huge blanket down for keekers. We said hi to a neighbor and got down to moderate business.

As I was getting things out of a car, James had Keely and some guy with a 5 pack came up. He was gushing about how cute Keely was and I immediately hated him. T R A S H. He talked to James, went on and on about our kids and finally left. Turns out he never even offered James a beer. I started to feel bad about my first reaction of him. I thought to myself "Jamie, he was probably just being neighborly, sharing a beer, letting us know he was there to help if we needed it.". No. He is trash. Our friends Gunner and Ahna were at her parents house, literally a few houses from us, and they brought over some neighbor girls.

We all went inside, not trashy man, and hung out for a while. I found out the neighbor girls don't like trashy man either and call him "the high schooler". I also found out I will be photographing Gunner and Ahnas upcoming wedding!! We found out our heater in the new house kicks ass. We found out there are Mosquitos. The girls told me they used to play in our yard when the house was empty and I told them they still could. We had an excellent pow wow and we are excited to own that place!

Home Depot, Landslides And A Legal Obligation

Yesterday we signed a slew of papers. I was only half listening to what I was signing because Keely was on the brink of losing it. My mom luckily had taken Will for the day so I didn't have to completely ignore everything I was agreeing to. I did gather a few key things.

1. We have a legal obligation to pay back our loan. (Can you believe they make you sign a paper stating that you understand this? Someone somewhere really effed with a bank)
2. Our loan is going to get sold to another bank no matter what. It's probably being sold as we speak. (Laymen's Terms: don't bother worrying what bank to get your loan from. It's getting sold to a big bank no matter what.)
3. It's going to cost us $10,000 just to sell this house if and when we go to do it. The fees and taxes get you real good. (When you low ball someone just take into consideration they are not necessarily making any money on this deal.)

After we signed all the papers we called up the Home Depot in Oak Harbor to get someone to come measure our place for carpet. 4 phone calls later we had an appointment. Not looking like a good sign. The other day the family took a trip to our local Home Depot and picked out tile. We then went and picked carpet. We then put a carpet sample next to the tile and were horrified at the two together. Our beautiful white carpet looked dingy and drab compared to the tile. We then grabbed a slew of sample carpet and picked one out. On the phone while making our appointment, the extremely soft spoken man wanted to know what carpet we wanted. I told him while James freaked out about wether it was "the one". James kept telling me not to pick it and the guy kept telling me he just needed to put something in the system. Meanwhile I can't hear either of them and just keep asking what? what? I have to leave the hub bub and retreat into the back bathroom just to hear this tiny mouse I am speaking to. I then get questioned by James about what I snuck off to talk about with the guy.

Very early this morning I get a random text from a relative asking me if my house was in a landslide. I joke back, stating maybe it was. The house we bought is in a neighborhood association which gives us private beach ownership. Well, the beach side of the road looks great. Across the street though, oh boy, major landslides going on there. It's a giant hill going straight up and packed full of trees. The land is sliding. It's only a matter of time before one of those beautiful houses gets it. Our house is fine. It's up the hill and a good distance from the hill dip. A road that accesses the house could get washed out but that most likely won't happen. My relative didn't write me back and towards the end of the day I learn about the Whidbey Island landslide that made national news. I even got a call from my worried grandmother. Awesome. Whidbey never makes national news and the day after we buy a house out there it's on the news. This stuff is whack.

We Got It

I have been holding out on writing because I didn't want to throw out one exciting thing. I firmly believe that I have something worth reading here.

A few weeks ago we bid on a house that was selling for $125,000. We offered $128,000 and we lost it. We weren't surprised at all. We figured a cash buyer came in and robbed us. Well that buyer backed out. Why? We frankly don't know. So we offered again and by golly, they accepted.

At first I was super excited. I felt like I finally won something. Then I started thinking, wait a minute, why us? There must be something wrong, very wrong. James has the septic pegged.

It's a strange story how we got to this point. Originally our realtor was selling it to someone else for the higher price. It's why we never saw it earlier. Well they put their offer in only to have it denied. The property had been grouped with other homes to be sold in bulk. That deal fizzled also and the house came back on. By then though the first family had bid on something else and couldn't bid. Then the price dropped. We bid. Lost it. It came back on. We bid. We got it. Whack! Buying a house is whack!

So here we sit, slightly excited, slightly anxious. The price is right. It has private pool, tennis court, and beach access. The lot next door is rumored to be for sale. James figured out that it could be owned by the ex wife of our possibly future neighbor. She now lives in Lynnwood. If we bought that we would be sitting so pretty. The house is the exact replica of where we live now, with a few minuscule details. It's more open inside but it has a horrendous entrance. Lets just say we will climb a lot of stairs there. Still, we are skeptical of this offer. Yes, we will take it. Save money and own a house? Ya Sure You Betcha. But what's the catch? How did we get this? What's wrong with this place? Stay tuned.

And We Are Back

We have arrived back at dead bug house. It wasn't bad to begin with but it wasn't "perfect". Well, they significantly lowered the price. After talking money, James and I decided to go for it.

James told me it would cost us $800 a month. That's with EVERYTHING. Hmmmmm... If that is correct, we would be SAVING money. We were pretty convinced we could sell it for a profit. We were convinced we could rent it for a profit. So we signed the papers and into waitsville we went.

Then our realtor calls us. She let us know that the listing agent needed us to sign a form stating that we know other offers exist. Today. By end of day. In a few hours. He, however, has emailed the form to her twice. She has not received it. He is busy and won't be by a computer for a few hours. Awesome.

She lets us know there are multiple offers in and more processing. M*th*r F*ck*r. Always happens. She lets us know that hopefully early next week the bank will pick its best offers and then come back to the buyers asking them what the highest they will go is. Excuse me, what? The highest I will go? This is my offer. I put in all I want to put in. I already offered above asking price. You want me to just offer your last asking price? What's the GD point??!! Seriously, our offer isn't all that shy of the last asking price. I hate bidding wars. It's not that amazing of a house. Freaking take it if you want it so bad. We all know what's going to happen. Someone is going to low ball the bank with cash and that's what they are going to take. Effers. It doesn't matter.

Even if that doesn't happen and we are one of the chosen few, we could offer more. The problem is, it's not that epic of a house. I have this bleeding heart where I want the house I live in to be appealing to me. This house doesn't exactly have it. Yes, it has a large open living space. It has pool and beach rights. It has an okay deck to keep deer away from my flowers. But, it has horrendous stairs to climb. It has no clear division of land. If I am in my backyard playing, everyone can see me. There's no fences. It's deep down the island. I am so completely torn! I hate it and love it. I can't wait to hear the outcome. Oh, we did get the papers signed. We are in.

We Were Counter Offered

It's a start but we are not offering what they want. Damn. It was a nice view.

I am sticking to my guns about this one. I was taking their decline as a sign. If they said no, we don't push back. Our agent called to say that the minimum the bank would take was $269,000. Our offer was $270,000 and they pay closing costs. Turns out that would leave them with $249,000 after everything is said and done. Good gravy. That's a lot of fees being paid. We would have to offer $290,000 for this place. Worth it? I don't know. Killer view.

James has gone on the fence now also. Suddenly he isn't sure about being on the island. He says the realization of the commute just hit him. Huh. So whatever. I am content with looking for a place with land. I want a house with a chunk of land. That's it. Quit tempting me with cute houses and tiny yards. Quit tempting me with amazing views and terrible insides. Give me a cute house, with a nice lot. And make it reasonable would you please?

We Went For It

We came back today to look at the house in the daylight. It wasn't terrible. The most it needs is a carpet cleaning and a paint job.

It could use a ton more work but that's all stuff we would do in time. The view is still epic. I will say one thing. Winterized houses are not places you want to be if you skipped going to the bathroom because you thought you could hold it. A woman who has had two cesareans can not hold it.

Our offer was not what they were asking for. We are still going round and round about offering more. I think we have decided to take it as a sign. The house flat out needs things done to it. It has a yard but not our ideal yard. It has a front yard that would be perfect if it weren't for the hundred foot pines growing in it. A few weeks ago we went to San Diego. We visited my aunt who owns a house with a great beach view. She told us that for years she has been calling her neighbor and asking him if she can cut his tree down. She only calls once a year and offers to pay for it. This year he finally took her up on it. We secretly hope the people across from this place do the same. It would add tons of value to their place and save us tons of money. Biggest bonus, the perfect place for a sweet dream garden.

The house does have a downstairs with a kitchen. It needs carpeting ( the whole downstairs) though and a fridge. It's not completely private from the top so renting it to strangers would take a hot minute. We do have some friends though we would love to rent it to but after talking to them I realized this downstairs area was not that great of a space. It really needs work to make it worth it to people. For one, there is no place for kitchen gadgets, for preparing large meals, for eating in even. The rooms are decent but they really need decor help.

We talked about what room would be the master upstairs and realized its odd. The master bedroom has a bathroom attached but was painted this bright deep blue. There's another room that is huge, no bathroom but ultra sweet closet. It also has a normal white paint job. No view though. The third room was converted to a laundry room so we would have to fix that. The kitchen needs updating of cupboards and floor. The windows need curtain rods and possibly blinds. The chandeliers need changing out. The deck needs privacy shields installed so you can hot tub in privacy. Just little things that would make it so nice.

In the car later in the day I told James that if we don't get this place I am putting the brakes on. We started out wanting a house with a shop on acreage. What we have ended up with is a house with no acreage, no shop, and a lot of work ahead of us. Seeing all these places has steered is in a direction I am not sure we want to go in. Little by little we have conceded in accepting things we didn't want. I don't want a container garden and if we get this place it what I will have. Not completely but definitely not the garden I dreamed off. Not the yard I dreamed of. It's amazing how we shifted our values and dreams over the course of house hunting. If we don't get it we are going back to the beginning.

Killer Sunset View

Okay, this house didn't sell me in pictures. For one, they are asking our max, max budget. It's not crazy nice, kinda a dump. We went and looked though because James wanted to see it. Wow. It's so nice. It's a dump but at the same time, it's so nice.

We looked at it in the dark. A bad, bad thing, I know. Our agents husband just bought her a headlamp, it came in quite handy. This house has an epic view of Double Bluff. It's a sunset view. It has a wall of windows. It has huge rooms. Huge! Some of the biggest I have ever been in. It has a hot tub. It has a sauna. The downstairs is so huge it's already set up for renting it out.

What a dump though. You walk in and you are hit with a closet. The carpet on your left hand side needs to be replaced. It looks like water damage but doesn't smell wet. Doesn't feel wet. The house has a new roof so it can't be from a leaky roof. Somehow though a lot of something seeped into the carpet. A lot. What it is is anyone's guess. The kitchen has vinyl flooring from the 60s. There's a lot of whacko paint jobs. The living room is epic huge. One of the upstairs bedrooms was converted into a laundry room. There used to be a very sick, dying man living there.

The downstairs has no carpeting. It's the real mess. I don't know too much detail about it because like I said, it was pitch black when we saw it and I was following a head lamp with Kiki in my arms. I did see what looked like rot on the floor when we were heading back upstairs. Shellie brushed it off with "Oh that. That's where they kept a huge aquarium with snakes". Maybe it's nothing, maybe it's a real problem.

We decided though to go for it. It's HUD and supposedly the offer we put in will be decided upon within a few days. James did some research on it and over the last year it has fluctuated in price greatly. Its been within our budget and its been severely out of our budget. We are going to offer less than the asking. We are also going to look at it in the light. Just to make sure. But we are pretty sure, even knowing what we know, that it would be stupid not to try and get it. That's the kind of place ballers live.

Oh My God It's Gorgeous!

Seriously, fell in love. Got shot down though. James hated it and only had 1 good, solid point. Too small. Damn.

This house was an excellent teacher in showing you all that goes into making a house nice. So. This guy bought a nasty shit hole. It had the warped dog pee floor. He fixed everything. EVERYTHING. It was beautiful. That's why I liked it. I liked it from the outside. It had a wide garage door, not one that was split into two doors. It was one big huge door. It looked nice. He put a trellis over it. It screamed potential grape vine. The house was completely fenced in. This meant no seeing cars and No Deer. Loved it! Open the door and was space! Ah! Fresh air!! No split level. Wide open space. To my right was the living room/ dining room. There was a huge closet ahead of me. To my left was a hallway with 3 bedrooms and a bathroom. It was painted yellow. It was clean, fresh, cheery, cute, open, friendly, it was perfect. The bedrooms were decent sized. The closets were large. The master bedroom was nice. Everything was brand new. All the appliances, the hardware, the flooring, everything. I was deliriously happy. Our realtor told us he was selling it for under $200,000. My jaw just dropped. I had no idea how he would turn a profit. I told her I wanted it.

James however saw through the thick cloud of awesomeness. He knew it was all cheap stuff. He knew the guy doing the remodel would make bank. He hated that it was on a "busy" street. He knew it was too small for us. Damn our downstairs. We own too much. My dreams were crushed. He knew I liked it so much because it was so nice. I was being fooled. He told me any place we bought we could make look that nice.

After looking at all the guys tools I wondered about making any place that nice. This house was a dump. There was trash and plastic and buckets and tools everywhere. A lot goes into making a place nice. I had no realistic idea. I see why now the cost is so high. Balls. We get to keep looking.

Our Twin

We found a house that could work... Dunno though. Great price. Comes with pool access and beach access. It's the twin to the house we have now. Our big questions are do we like it because its what we know? And is it just too far away?

Tough questions to ask ourselves. The yard is eh. Apparently the lot next door is possibly for sale. We would have to find out who the owner is. Call them. Explain ourselves and hear her price. Could be worth it. The house isn't that expensive and with the lot we are golden. Right now it has a peek a boo view. Yeah, it's there but, you gotta scan for it. It doesn't exactly hit you. With the lot we could knock a few trees down and bam. Nice view.

The house itself is nothing spectacular. It's a split level. You have to climb a flight of stairs to get to the front door. Negative. Open the door and you have a choice. Go up stairs or go down stairs. If you choose to go up you walk into a rather open living space. It's quite nice, the space. It is currently spattered with dead moths and flies. We really aren't sure how they got there and there was nothing alive flying around. It has vaulted ceilings with track lighting. The kitchen is right there and it needs a refrigerator but that's it. Outside is a okay balcony. Again, lichen covered but inaccessible to deer. It may actually suck because it has no stairs into the yard. At the same time it doesn't suck because the deer cant get to the plants that inevitably would flourish on it. Down the hall is a bathroom and three bedrooms. One room has a mysterious spot. Could be a spilled drink, could be blood.

Downstairs is a laundry room, an awkward play room and the garage. Just like the house we currently rent. We hardly use the downstairs space. The one we have now is bigger and it's full of toys and possessions we can't part with.

I would say go for it. It's so cheap. However, it's a long drive from the ferry. Lets be realistic. It's not that bad. It just feels like its a long drive. It's a long drive to a decent grocery store and that is realistic. It's so tough. Cheap house, pool access, beach access, long drive, barely a yard, surrounded by neighbors with no fences dividing up properties, needs prettifying, possibly spending $40,000+ to get the neighboring lot. Why not keep looking for a place that has property? Gah!

Killer Sunrise View

I mean epic killer. But, you will never know. Totally forgot my camera. Oh well. It was occupied anyway and the tenant was there.

I found this house on the MLS website. It was the top of our price range. Not the uncomfortable top but the getting close to uncomfortable top. It look awesome. It looked empty. It looked like it had a decent yard. This was the house that sparked the comment "Pictures tell a thousand lies". James loved it, I sorta hated it. The view was totally epic.

It was a split level. It had an entry way though. Up the cheap staircase and you arrived in the kitchen. Tiny. With this crazy amazing view where did the kitchen window face? Oh that's right. The neighbors ugly house. What. A. Waste. The living room was extremely long and narrow. This tenant still had her Christmas decorations up including the tree. Honestly, she had rotting pumpkins hanging out too. She was sweet though. She had baked goods for us. Off the kitchen were 3 (?) bedrooms and a bathroom. Eh.

Downstairs was 2 bedrooms, a TV room, a storage room and yes, a gun closet. We don't know this for sure. I saw it, saw the lock on it and immediately thought guns. James had hope. He did inform me though that in the tenants bedroom there was a rifle hanging out. Awesome. It's where her sick kid was hanging out whole we explored. She also informed us her room had no closet.

The yard turned out to be small. It has well established fruit trees though and space to put some of my plants. Still, I just wasn't digging on the space. Such a huge house and the configuration made it small and awkward. I guess it was a short sale. The owners moved to Alaska. It was nice but not what I thought I was going to see. No poop though. Huge plus.

Mukilteo Madness

So we have gotten a little burnt out with Whidbey Island. It's very defeating to see pictures online and then haul our family across the Puget only to discover a less than ideal property. I sent James a slaughtering of houses in Lynnwood. He responded back with a Mukilteo house. From 1922. That has never been updated since 1960.

Since our agent is on the island we called the listing agent to show it to us. First we did a drive by. Cute. Small. Rattiest house on the block. There was a car parked in the garage, which had no door, but the house had no lights on. You could tell someone lived there. That turned out to be very wrong.

Our listing agent, Ed, told us the owners were selling it. HA. HA. HA. Technically they were. The real case is that the owner died. His ex wife was selling the place. Very sneaky Ed, very sneaky. It's important to us to know this info. People that inherit a house may be willing to negotiate price. Often times they live no where near let alone know anything about the worth of the location.

So we walk in. The living room ceiling is tiled and there are missing tiles. Lots of missing tiles and lots of discoloration. Ed proceeds to let us know the roof will probably also need replacing. How one must feel to lead potential customers to a dump. Honesty was the best policy and Ed had a very good attitude about it.

The kitchen was very similar but less cool than the awesome old place we saw on the island. The stove counter was extremely low. Anyone in a wheelchair would idealize it. The former owner had all these kitchen appliances from the 60s. They obviously made quality stuff back then. There was a wood stove also in the kitchen. Will insisted on opening it. I somehow knew it was going to be bad. I expected a dead rat but it was chock full of trash. Stuff that should never be burned but probably commonly was in that house. He had a chalkboard also that had old person handwriting with weather dates on it. Wills birthday was the first one, stating that it was the coldest at 4 degrees.

The rest of the house was tiny. There were three doors in the hallway one right after the other. Ed and I wondered why they weren't merged into 1 closet. He told us that back in the day, in New England, there was no property tax. You were taxed based off of how many doors you had in your place. Interesting. Our previous owner was a furniture maker and every drawer and shelf had wood or wood relations in it. He did have 2 pieces of art that were clearly from the 80s. His clothes were still hanging in his closet. That made me sad. His bed had a black velvet headboard. Hot. There were at least ten trash bags with full newspapers in them. He had tons of vinyl records. Dude loved him some music. I'm sure any DJ would have loved his old school collection. He had a lamp covered in the free stickers magazines send you. Obviously a ongoing work of art. It had its fair share of Playboy stickers on it.

Outside is where the poop showed up. It was the holy grail of poop. There was a large pile of dirt that had no business being where it was located. Which happened to be by a door. I went over to investigate. I thought for sure I would see a hole or some horribly expensive thing to mend. What I found was a ton of old cat turds and a super fresh one. A Ton. I thought about telling Ed but decided against it.

It was very loud at that place. Boeing is crazy close and the sound of airplanes taking off was quite prevalent. There was a view. You had to be outside to see it. You also had to stand facing your neighbors junk yard. No way am I paying $300,000 to live next to trash. The yard was pretty alright. I could garden, the kids could play. The trampoline and hammock could stay.

There was a shop full of tools. Now mind you, this was the garage. That had no door. Wide open. Full of wood working tools. Clearly a great neighborhood. I asked Ed what was going to happen to all this stuff. I wanted to know who was going to claim it all. He was honest, told me the whole thing was a mess. Lots of people were involved, nursing homes were involved as well as museums. Yikes. He seemed a little burdened by it all. The owner had 5 acres that sold for over 1 million dollars recently. Apparently there was a lot of property for sale with this mans passing and the house we were looking at was the last thing to sell.

In the car we nixed it. We thought we could make it what we wanted but after seeing the inside we knew it wasn't so. Too expensive to fix and update. How can something so pricey be so nasty?

Of Course We Lost It

I was worried though. I thought that because we really didn't want it, we would of course get it. Luckily, not the case. Whew!

I mean it does suck. All those awesome amenities, gone. However, we are not stuck with a tiny house with a stupid small yard that needed a complete overhaul. However, we no longer have a house we could have made a ton of money off of. Where is the plus side?

Back to the drawing board. James is bummed, I am ecstatic. He has no faith will ever find a house, I can't wait to find the perfect house. One thing I did learn is I really need to lower my expectations. My dream home does not exist. I need to realize that kids play in tiny spaces (and are quite happy) all the time. I need to understand that if I bought the perfect house it would cost way too much and it would be done. My creative side would have nothing to do. I need a coloring book that hasn't been colored in. I have things that I want to do to a house and if we bought one that has everything my stuff that I love and cherish way too much would have nowhere to go. Worse, it would ruin the space by condensing it with my loved things.

So there's that. Someone else, who probably has tons of cash, gets to rip out carpet that has piss and shit on it. They get to repaint the entire place and fix all the bruises the house has from the previous wheelchair owner. They get to make a marginal profit and we get to keep hunting.

Oh It's Nasty Alright

Did you wonder? I found the poop or something equivalent in a bedroom of course. This one was the dirtiest, banged up house we have ever seen. But, the process to buy is kinda neat.

So, the buying day expires in 48 hours. It's an electronic bid. Only 8 people have looked at it, if that. Its sold as is. So thankfully there will be no BS later about fixing this or that. You have to offer the price or less. If you offer more, that's out of pocket. Your loan will only be for $180,000. If we want to offer $186,000 that extra $6,000 comes from our own savings. We should know very quickly if they accept. Honestly, I don't care. It was stupid not to try. It's not a dream home, it's a money maker.

The place needs new carpet ASAP. It is so gross. Stains everywhere. The entire house HAS TO BE RE CARPETED. No carpet cleaning magic is gonna fix that. The walls are filthy. They are severely banged up also. The house clearly had a disabled person residing in it. A wheelchair person we assume since the bottom of the walls are the most beat up. There are support bars everywhere. There's also lots of holes where things were nailed in. It must be re painted.

It's a split level. The top has a tiny living room with pretty killer view, a kitchen, 2 bedrooms, a bathroom and 2 exits onto the lichen infested deck. The downstairs has a large dark room which has a very peculiar design, an attached bathroom, a dedicated laundry room and a garage. The deck is pretty sweet but needs to be deer proofed. The yard sucks. Sucks hard. However, directly behind the house is an empty lot. The neighborhood is awesome, the amenities are awesome.

We fully expect to either be out bid or lose to a cash buyer. Fully expect this. We know it has a bid already in. We could get lucky though and that's what we are riding on. I am good with losing it, James is already groaning about how he hates looking. So we will see! Enjoy these nasty, nasty pictures.